ADHD, Self-Compassion, and Finding My Way
Embracing ADHD with Kindness
In March 2022, my youngest daughter received her adult ADHD diagnosis; at the same time, her assessor suggested that I also had ADHD and advised me at the age of 50 to seek a referral for myself, which I did the next day.
Throughout the lengthy assessment my daughter went through, we both learned more and more about ADHD and the phrase “mum you do this” were words often spoken by her to me. So, by the time the assessor gently suggested that I also had ADHD, I didn’t need to be convinced.
Anyone who’s been through an adult ADHD assessment knows the grief and anger that can come after a diagnosis.
Grief that you thought it was your fault all of your life that you didn’t fit in, anger that nobody picked it up sooner, and frustration that far too many people say, “Well, you seem normal”.
Then comes a ton of unmasking, recognising what coping mechanisms you’ve used to minimise ADHD symptoms, recognising how your energy changes depending on the mental load of any particular task or how much you are required by society to mask in different situations.
And finally, slowly but surely, you start making adjustments that allow you to live more authentically.